Cardiff Central train station isn't dead, it's only sleeping
Suz the security guard walked around Cardiff central train station wearing her High Vis jacket and the mask. People were still catching the few trains which were still running. There were about twenty people every hour, most wearing masks and a few looking shocked at how quiet the station was.
It’s not as though the virus isn’t everywhere.
The best thing to happen recently was two dogs had run into the station and chased each other around. One of the ticket inspectors had taken it upon himself to try and chase the dogs out and for a fun five minutes the two dogs and the ticket inspector had chased each other around the station. Suz thought about the dogs and smiled. At the time she'd laughed so hard she forgot to record it and there was no one around to tell.
When did that happen? Was it yesterday? Was it Monday?
Today was Wednesday. She looked up at the large station clock by the shut Marks and Spencers. It was 5:30pm, usually the first wave of exhausted commuters would be washing into the station, but there wasn’t even tumbleweed. She looked across the deserted forecourt and despaired.
She was bored, but Suz didn’t mind being bored. She was glad she was in work, there’d been dark whispers that…
“Hi Suz. Can I have a quick word?”
““All I’ve got in are two cans of Spaghetti Hoops and some Fosters Lite. I’ve pissed better than Fosters Lite.” ”
Fuck.
Two minutes later she was in the tiny office with her supervisor Ken.
He slumped in his chair.
“I’m sorry to do this Suz…”
“No.”
“We’ve got to let you go…”
“No.”
“Only temporarily like, you know until all this blows over…”
“Fuck, but…”
“I don’t know. It’ll probably be just a couple of weeks.”
“A couple of weeks? What am I supposed to do until then? All I’ve got in are two cans of Spaghetti Hoops and some Fosters Lite. I’ve pissed better than Fosters Lite.”
“I dunno, there’s those government schemes, I bet Tescos are looking for people.”
“Tescos? This isn’t fair.”
“I’m sorry Suz, it’s hard all over. I’m going to have to go out and do the security route instead of you.”
“Well boo fucking hoo.”
“Don’t be like that. I don’t want to do this. Maybe…”
Suz tried to tear her High Vis jacket off but the Velcro from the front got stuck on the Velcro on the arm. She finally got it off and threw it at Ken, slamming the door on her way out. Suz stomped out into the deserted station with no idea where she was going.
I’m not going to cry. They aren’t going to make me cry. Fuck it, I’ll go to the ‘Spoons. Oh fuck.
All the Wetherspoons were closed and they had been for weeks. Usually there’d be someone in the pub who - if not necessarily happy - for the price of a drink would be prepared to hear her bitch and moan. Suz got to the doors of the station but couldn’t find the energy to go through.
This place is more than work, it’s where I meet people, it’s where I help people. Fuck, I think it’s who I am.
She fell against a wall and slid down.
I’m not going to cry. I’m not going to let them see me cry.
Suz brought her hands up to cover her face.
God, I’m so tired.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes.”
“Are you...sure?”
“No.”
She took her hands from her face to see a bald bloke with a white beard and a belly straining against his belt. He was dressed all in black except for his dog collar.
“Great.”
“Can I help?”
“I appreciate the concern, but I’m not buying what you’re selling father.”
“Call me Lionel.”
“Okay, but I’m still not buying what you’re selling Lionel.”
“I’m not selling anything. I just saw you stride across the station and then slump. I was worried.”
“There’s nothing you can do to help. Thanks.”
“Why don’t you tell me what’s wrong? Maybe I can?”
Oh why don’t you just fuck off.
Suz sighed.
“I’ve just been told...I’ve just been told that I haven’t got a job cause of the virus and now…”
She could feel herself welling up and bit her lip.
I’m not going to cry, especially in front of him.
“...and now I don’t know what I’m going to do. I don’t know how I’m going to pay the rent or buy food.”
“Do you have any family who could help you out?”
Family.
“No I...no, my family wouldn’t help.”
“There’s Universal Credit the government are….”
“The government...Universal Credit will take days or weeks to come through. What am I going to do till then? I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
“We can help. I’ve been working with some volunteers to get people registered for what they need we could get you on the fast track.”
The doors to the station opened and a bird flew in. It ducked and weaved around the art deco lights and swooped through the air before flying out again.
“It doesn’t matter how fast the track is. I need money now, to buy food, to buy electricity.”
“We can help out as well, we have a contingency fund . We can give you a bridging loan until you get the government help. There wouldn't be any rush to pay us back, it’s there for emergencies. We just didn’t think…” Lionel looked around at the deserted station.
Oh shit. Don’t be nice to me.
“Lionel that’s very…”she searched for the word “...kind, but I can’t…”
What the fuck are you saying?!
“Why?”
“It’s your whole...thing…” she waved a finger at his dog collar. “I don’t believe in it.”
“I don’t care. You need help and I can provide it.”
“But I’ve always paid my way. I’ve never taken charity.”
“We could always do with another pair of hands around the place, you can help out. Can you drive?”
“Yes.”
“Great, you’ll be really useful.”
Will I now?
“Please take this offer of help. There’s no ulterior motive. I just want to help you out. Please.”
Lionel held his hand out, Suz stared at it.
“We’re both wearing gloves. I think we’re okay to do this just once.”
Suz took Lionel’s hand and let him help her up. It was the first physical contact she’d had with anyone in a month.
“Come with me and we’ll get you sorted out.” he smiled at Suz and she returned it.
Before they left Suz turned and looked back at the station.
It breaks my heart to see it so naked.
“Look at that? Look at this place it should be packed with people, but it’s dead.”
Lionel smiled.
“Cardiff Central train station isn’t dead, it's only sleeping.”